Funerals are painful and difficult events. Friends of the deceased want to be supportive to the bereaved family members, but they may not be sure what to say or how to act. While there is no “right” thing to say or do in the face of grief, the following are some etiquette tips from Funeral Homes in Lakewood Wa that can serve as general guidelines for getting through a funeral.
Dress
The old custom of wearing black to signify mourning has mostly gone by the wayside. When choosing attire for a funeral, think about showing respect and honoring the occasion. Your clothes should be clean, neat, and not too informal, but your clothes matter much less than your presence.
Seating
The first two rows of seating are reserved for immediate family. Often the family will be escorted in after everyone else has been seated, and the reserved rows are usually clearly labeled. If you attend a funeral where the deceased has very little immediate family, you may want to join a spouse or sibling if they are sitting alone.
Condolences
After the funeral, there will be time to greet the family members and express your condolences. Think about what you want to say in advance and keep it very brief. Just express your sympathy and don’t try to tell a story or engage in conversation. Even if you are a close friend of a bereaved person, the funeral isn’t a time to talk because there are so many other people waiting for his or her attention.
Phones
It should go without saying, but nothing is more inappropriate in the middle of a solemn event than a ring tone, and nothing looks more rude than attending to a phone call or text during a funeral. The best thing to do with a cell phone is to leave it in the car.
Gifts
Flowers are still the most popular funeral gifts. Some are carried to the graveside while others are distributed among family members to take home. However, not all families want flowers, and many nowadays will include a statement in the obituary or funeral announcement requesting a donation to a particular charity in lieu of flowers. Make sure you know what the family’s wishes are before buying or sending flowers.
